Halloween Week

So I am pretty much a pain this week. I realized that I have been an ass to a few of my friends [although some for some pretty good reasons] and to my family. I can't really help it. I am stressing out with a lot of things lately. My dad is going to get his lymph node in his neck checked out today, since it has been swollen for over a month. It could be anything from cancer to a long cold. I don't know and it is worrying me. He also is on "a break" with his girlfriend, so has been really down lately. I am just on a short fuse, which is unlike me...that is how I know something is up.

I am going to stay with him this weekend and I have no idea what to expect.


On a lighter note, my Dad got tickets to see the Trans-Siberian Orchestra on December 26th. Two months from now. I am really excited. I am also going to see the Chiefs\Seahawks game with him this weekend.

So

Last week can easily be described as one of the best examples of how a good week can go downhill in the blink of an eye. I had an anxiety attack on Thursday and I am still a little shakey. The best part of all this is that my parents and family members are trying to interrogate me as to why I had it. As if that makes things better.

This friday, two of my cousins, my sister, and her boyfriend get to live in my house while my mom and her sister and my grandparents are in Las Vegas. The thing is...I am the only one who doesn't get to stay at my house. I have to stay at my dad's while they turn my home into a fun house. Fucking A-rated greatness.

This weekend I have Sarah's party and a couple of other things, such as napping outside my dad's house, so I don't think I will have to worry about being couped-up at my dad's this weekend

I am so damn-ready for summer.

I want to move to Australia.

Wyatt Fucking Earp

The symbol you display on your flag was inspired by I. You found courage through my words. You and your little merry group of fucking rag-torn rebels are doing this in hoping that I approve. I have given you drive. You eat not to quell your hunger but because its one of those things you have to do to, well, stay alive.

I, on the other hand, just saw the damage you did while I was watching television and saw that you were on your way here to collect me and escort me safely to the awaiting yacht that you apparently learned to hijack from a book or Claude Speed or some bullshit so now I have to stay peering through bent kitchen window blinds hoping the fuck that you don't mistake me for an officer of the law or ice cream man or pope or religious-experience-inflicting satelite.

Seriously, we'll make it to the boat right before you fuck up and accidently propel a bullet from your shoulder slung rifle right through my goddamn chest leaving me to stare at the sky for the next 14 hours while I bleed out and hallucinate and have a conversation with my brain and have it tell me it's showing me this shit because if it doesn't I will flip right the fuck out with what reality really looks like right about now.

And you didn't even bother to ask if I wanted to go with you.

Christ shit!

Your Problems are everyone's problems

Choices. We all make them or don't make them. Depending on what we want usually depends on our ids, our taught wants...what we want from other people. Attention...strife...love...it all affects people. Just be sure you know how your choices will affect others before you do them. One can be too selfish...think too much of themselves and put their needs before others. Likewise, people can be too selfless. We need to take care of our own problems before tending to others.

Remember that everything you do, whether it be skipping homework, cheating on a lover, or even destroying yourself at any given pace from alcohol to suicide will deeply affect others in the long run...even the next day. This is to all the people who can't take back those choices...but probably would have by giving those choices a single, second thought.

You Get What you Give by The New Radicals

Wake up kids
We've got the dreamers disease
Age fourteen
They got you down on your knees
So polite
We're busy still saying please
Frienemies
Who when you're down ain't your friend
Every night
We smash their mercedes benz
First we run
And then we laugh 'till we cry
But when the night is falling
And you cannot find the light
you feel your dreams are dying
Hold tight
You've got the music in you
Don't let go
You've got the music in you
One dance left
This world is gonna pull through
Don't give up
You've got a reason to live
Can't forget we only get what we give
[I'm comin' home baby]
[You're tops, give it to me now]
Four a.m. we ran a miracle mile
We're flat broke
But hey we do it in style
The bad rich
God's flying in for your trial
But when the night is falling
And you cannot find a friend
You feel your tree is breaking
Just bend
You've got the music in you
Don't let go
You've got the music in you
One dance left
This world is gonna pull through
Don't give up
You've got a reason to live
Can't forget
We only get what we give
This whole damn world can fall apart
You'll be ok follow your heart
You're in harms way I'm right behind
Now say you're mine
You've got the music in you
Don't let go
You've got the music in you
One dance left
This world is gonna pull through
Don't give up
You've got a reason to live
Can't forget
We only get what we give
Don't let go
I feel the music in you
Fly high
What's real can't die
We only get what we give
You're gonna get what you give
Just dont be afraid to live
Health insurance rip off lying FDA big bankers buying
Fake computer crashes dining
Cloning while they're multiplying
Fashion shoots with Beck and Hanson
courtney love and marilyn manson
You're all fakes
Run to your mansions
Come around
We'll kick your ass in

Needing an update

Its been 20 days since my last update, so here we go...


The world is spinning gracefully in our solar system. The stock market is up, and everyone is happy.


Really, I am doing pretty well. My grades are improving and I really couldn't ask for a better relationship right now. Yesterday I went paintballing and today, I am pretty sore.

I have not been sick in over a year, so I know when I get sick because I feel off and different. Well, I feel off and different today and I hope I am not getting what Sarah has. I can't miss school and I just refuse to be sick.

ON A LIGHTER NOTE

Gas is $1.99 in Kansas and as low as $1.94 in some Missouri areas. This probably has to do with the recent oil well findings in the Gulf. It is a good sign since Gasoline takes 6 months to process, so the companies that plan the pricings are thinking that in 6 months, they will make their proposed profit since they believe the price per barrel will be significantly lower in 6 months.

Yay